Being a bon viveur, I am truly excited about all things Gourmet. That's why the first night at dinner the menu stated the meals were the brain child of Jacques* something-or-another straight out of France, I was prepared to be amazed. The menu made my mouth water. I chose the smoked Salmon, lamb chops and crème brûlée.First off I was not the sole person at my table to choose the smoked salmon. Another lady across from me said she had always wanted to try it, but never had. The smoked salmon had a hard texture and tasted funny. "I don't see why people rave about smoked salmon," the lady said pushing her plate away. She was right, it was not edible. Maybe she would have reacted the same to a proper smoked salmon, but in her mind this was a proper smoked salmon.
The lamb too cooked. There was not even a bit of pink. Shamefully, I had ordered the most expensive red wine on the menu (a Bourgogne) thinking it would go well with good lamb chops. About this time, I heard a load thump, and thought the boat hit something. In retrospect I know it was simply Escoffier rolling over in his grave.
Well at least there is the single most important food ever created by man, the crème brûlée. In my opinion, crème brûlée should be its own food group. The top of the crème brûlée was caramelized and beautiful. I cracked into the beautiful burnt sugary crust and all seemed well. I raised my spoon to my mouth, and discovered the creme was not smooth and creamy, but curdled, and egg smelling. Again, the person trying crème brûlée for her first time would probably assume this was crème brûlée.
I visited the dining room two more times before swearing it off, and eating hamburgers, Chinese food, and sandwiches for the rest of the trip. At least the cooks would be hard-pressed to screw those up. It was disheartening, but necessary for survival.
Sometimes phrases in French can more easily describe what had happened to the cuisine on this ship: Ils veulent péter plus haut que leurs culs.
*Some French name, you get the picture.
3 comments:
I'm sorry the food was ick. Maybe a fine bottle of Boone's Farm would have made the meal better??
Gotta love the Boone's, it is the first "wine" a lot of us drink. I think the Beatles loved it too, just think about the song "Strawberry Fields Forever."
TACKY.....just tacky.
I feel so validated for never wanting to take a cruise. I mean it might be fun once with a group of friends or something, but there are so many other fabulous vacations to spend money on.
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